Our Wedding Vows
Introduction/Greeting by Officiant
Welcome. We are here to witness and celebrate the love and marriage of Lila and Christian. We, their family and friends, form a community of love so that we may nurture them in their lives together.
Opening Address, Officiant
When Lila and Christian were writing the words for this ceremony, they encountered some challenges to finding just the right words that best expressed how they feel for one another and how they feel about their marriage to one another. As with everything else they have done to prepare for their wedding and their future together, they collaborated — writing, reading, and talking through several drafts.
They wanted to make sure that you, their family and friends, were acknowledged as participants in the ceremony. They sought words that emphasized not just what they are doing today, but what they will be doing together for the rest of their lives. They wanted to emphasize that they have chosen to make a permanent commitment to their love for one another.
So, when it came to this opening address, Lila and Christian worked together to find a theme they could establish. Words that came to mind included trust, respect, and, of course, love. However, one word that stood out to them was cooperation. For, in addition to love, that is what marriage is to them.
Many others would describe marriage in terms of compromise, but Lila and Christian felt that cooperation reflects a fuller model for their relationship and their marriage. To compromise means to concede something of one’s own for the sake of settling a difference with another — and both will certainly do that as part of their marriage. But the word cooperate comes from Latin roots that mean “to work with” and Lila and Christian felt that signified something more meaningful to their marriage. For, by cooperating, they will both be contributing something of themselves to their relationship. They will help one another, comfort one another, and allow their different interests and abilities to complement one another, so that, together, they will form a more complete union.
Declarations of Consent/Intent
Officiant: Lila and Christian, I ask you now in the presence of your family and friends to declare your intent.
Officiant: Christian, will you take Lila to be your wife, to live together in marriage? Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, to be faithful to her as long as you both shall live?
Christian: I will.
Officiant: Lila, will you take Christian to be your husband, to live together in marriage? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, to be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?
Lila: I will.
Officiant to family and friends: Will all of you witnessing these promises do all in your power to uphold Lila and Christian in their marriage?
Family and friends: We will.
Vows (Lila and Christian prompted by Officiant)
Bride: Christian, I vow to love you and honor you as long as we both live. I vow to respect you, listen to you, and grow with you, through good times and bad. Without hesitation and with full confidence in the step I am taking, I offer myself to you as your wife.
Groom: Lila, I vow to love you and honor you as long as we both live. I vow to respect you, listen to you, and grow with you, through good times and bad. Without hesitation and with full confidence in the step I am taking, I offer myself to you as your husband.
Ring Exchange (Lila and Christian prompted by Officiant)
Bride: Christian, you are the one with whom I can share all that I am. With free and unconstrained soul, I give you all I am and all I am to become. Take this ring as a token of my love, and with it my promise of faith, patience, and love, for the rest of my life.
Groom: Lila, you are the one with whom I can share all that I am. With free and unconstrained soul, I give you all I am and all I am to become. Take this ring as a token of my love, and with it my promise of faith, patience, and love, for the rest of my life.
Supplementary Reading by Joel Herbert
Officiant: And now, Lila and Christian have asked their friend, Joel Herbert, to read an Apache Marriage Blessing.
Joel: Now you will feel no rain, for each of you will be the shelter for each other. Now you will feel no cold, for each of you will be the warmth for the other. Now you are two persons, but there is only one life before. Go now to your dwelling place to enter into the days of your life together. And may your days be good and long upon the earth.
Treat yourselves and each other with respect, and remind yourselves often of what brought you together. Give the highest priority to the tenderness, gentleness, and kindness that your connection deserves. When frustration, difficulty and fear assail your relationship – as they threaten all relationships at one time or another – remember to focus on what is right between you, not only the part which seems wrong. In this way, you can ride out the storms when clouds hide the face of the sun in your lives – remembering that even if you lose sight of it for a moment, the sun is still there. And if each of you takes responsibility for the quality of your life together, it will be marked by abundance and delight.
Pronouncement of Marriage
Officiant: Today you begin a new life together united by a love that has transcended distance, a love that will see you through the great journey of a lifetime. May love and laughter light your days, and warm your heart and home. May good and faithful friends be yours. May peace and plenty bless your world with joy. May all life’s passing seasons bring the best to you. May what love has united never be divided.
Officiant: I now pronounce you husband and wife.
(Lila and Christian kiss.)
Presentation of Married Couple to Guests
Officiant: Family, friends, I present Mr. Christian Lee and Ms. Lila Thabit Lee.
May 18th, 2010 at 8:39 am
Priceless. Inspiration. Thank you for all that you are to this world and everyone in it.